television joy

The television said you were downtown
in the dungeon of the ladies jail.
The lieutenant claims you've been dancing
through the traffic au naturel.
A motorcar rode up on a lamppost,
you got the driver so confused.
Smashing his smile on the sidewalk
seemed the safest way to keep you amused.

Well, I ain't gonna wonder
if you know what's right or wrong.
If I see you coming,
don't think I'm gonna hang around.
You were once my girl,
now every guy in the world
wants your pants to shake his hands in,
whether silk or corduroy,
and if you don't wear them dancing,
what a joy!

Do you remember that Vatican Summer?
It's when I knew you were beyond all hope.
You were doing the twist with a cardinal
and the bossa nova with the Pope.
I didn't have a dime for the paper
but a voice inside my radio
told me Television Joy fornicated
from Baltimore to Tokyo.

Well, I ain't gonna wonder
if you know what's right or wrong.
If I see you coming,
don't think I'm gonna hang around.
You were once my girl,
now every guy in the world
wants your pan to fry his bacon
with the eggs you love hard-boiled
and if you just turn your flame on,
what a joy!

Copyright 2005 by James Owens